Relationships are beautiful and occupy a very important position in our life. It’s like, the world changes for you, And how can we forget the butterflies we get. It’s a very special feeling to feel important for somebody and to make them feel equally special. However, in some cases , the magic seems to vanish away in very less time. There can be quarrelling and jealousy developing. These are signs of a toxic relationship that one needs to not fall in. Well, there are some early signs that can help you not to fall in these kind of toxic relationship. As it is said, prevention is better than cure. Usually we get engaged in a toxic relationship when we have less amount of love for ourselves and we end up building an emotional dependence around a person. So, if you want to be in a good relationship, keep reading.
10. Thinking that you found the love of your life too quickly
Well, this happens with all of us. Just after the first date, many of us fall for the charm and think that this is the person we want to spend an eternity with. However , this isn’t true. Wait for some days and discover if you still feel the butterflies or they’re gone. Do something that distracts you thinking about them. If you’re successful , you know what it is.
9. You idealize your partner too much
And that’s something you shouldn’t do. In the early stages of dating , you need to listen more than talk. Every single word and description needs to be taken into consideration as this is about your entire life getting changed. Don’t keep reassuring yourself that you’re going to work this out. It may seem easy now, but it will be a major issue later.
8. Neglecting friends to please your partner
Changing your priorities after seeing a person is something that isn’t going to give you a better result. It is just going to tear apart some very important people from your life. You need to maintain a balance between all of them. You shouldn’t ignore your friends or keep talking about the significant other with them. Instead , introduce the person you’re dating to your friends. Maybe they see something you can’t as their though aren’t crowded like yours. And if your so called live of life is not interested in meeting your friends , then he or she may not be willing to be in a serious long term relationship,
7. Forgetting about your hobbies
Just because you’ve a new special person in your life, doesn’t means that you should give up on other things you love. You should never let your hobbies die. An enthusiastic and active person who is interested in many different things is very attractive as a partner. Don’t make your loved one the center of your universe. It’s important to understand that it’s unfair to your partner if you completely depend on them for your happiness, your well-being, and your overall mood.
6. Ignoring the alarming signals
If you always have an explanation for the mistakes he makes, and always try to defend him despite the fact that it’s his fault, then you need to stop and think a little. You don’t owe anyone anything. If you feel anything suspicious or bad, you need to talk to him or her and get going. Thinking that they may change on their own is hopeless.
5. Unreservedly trusting their opinion
If you’ve started changing your choice according to them , then you’re doing wrong. One must maintain how they exactly are else your partner will end up losing interest in you and you might end up losing a part of yourself. Replacing your beliefs with those of your partner makes you a person who you’re not.
4. Excessive jealousy
Jealousy is not good for a relationship. Atleast an excess of it. Sometimes there are reasons for being jealous while sometimes you just lose people because of yourself. No one will tolerate constant distrust and questioning and the need ti regularly reassure you of their love. However in some cases, there might be some reason behind it and that your partner won’t admit. If that’s the case, you need to reconsider your relationship.
3. You can’t stand it when your partner isn’t around
We always want to be around our partner but this sometimes leads to more distance than closeness. There needs to be some healthy space in a relationship. There may be times when your partner is hanging out with his or her friends and your constant messages can irritate them. So give them and yourself the space needed if you want things to work.
2. Justifying your partner’s terrible behaviour
When we are in a relationship , we tend to find everything good in our partner even if it’s not. We end up giving explanations for whatever terrible they do. All we think is that they’re the wisest people on earth. What doesn’t affects you today may turn your world upside down in the later phase of your relationship.
1. You just can’t say no
You need to know that you don’t have to give a positive affirmation for whatever your partner offers. If you’re not willing to do anything that your partner asks, you just need to say no. Don’t hesitate to refuse invitations to events that aren’t of interest to you, events that don’t fit your schedule, or requests that you feel are inappropriate. Because in the end, it’s not going to be appreciated.
Bonus: What to do when you feel that your emotions are about to take over
If your emotions and feelings are taking over, you need to remember a few things.
1. It’s only you who is responsible for the emotional state of yours. Your partner is not the one over whom you can burden it.
2. Don’t let negative energy surround you. Live in the moment and stop thinking about what your partner must be doing or what he or she said and what they meant. It will just torment you.
3. Locate a comfortable place in your body and mentally put an “internal observer” in that area. This is a part of you that will preserve objectivity in any situation and won’t let emotions get the best of you. Look around and see the situation through the eyes of the “internal observer.” If you’re feeling emotionally overwhelmed, remember that those feelings and the feelings that you’re experiencing toward your partner at that moment do not define the entirety of your life.
4. Find ways to cheer yourself up and use resources around you to ger over the obsessive thoughts of your partner. Do something you love to do, drink some coffee or anything else that makes you happy.
If nothing helps and you feel that you can’tget out of a complicated and painful relationship, don’t hesitate to turn to a professional therapist.